Welcome to the Hotel Hell
- Dwight Schrute: Welcome to the Hotel Hell. Check-in time in now, check-out time is never.
- Jim Halpert: Does my room have cable?
- Dwight Schrute: No. And the sheets are made of fire.
- Jim Halpert: Can I change rooms?
- Dwight Schrute: Sorry we're all booked up. Hell convention in town.
- Jim Halpert: Can I have a late check-out?
- Dwight Schrute: I'll have to talk to the manager.
- Jim Halpert: You're not the manager, even in your own fantasy?
- Dwight Schrute: I'm the owner.. the co-owner. With Satan!
- Jim Halpert: Okay, just so I understand it. In your wildest fantasy, you are in hell and you are co-running a bed and breakfast with the devil.
- Dwight Schrute: But I haven't told you my salary yet.
- Jim Halpert: Go.
- Dwight Schrute: Eighty thousand dollars.
